I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
