what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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