I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
