I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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