Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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