She said her name was "party"
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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