I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize
