There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Can you repeat that, but with context?
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