My first STD was from a foam party
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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