I'm drive I can fine osifer
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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