uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Randomize
