Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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