I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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