she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
You don't make any sense
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