break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
