what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
