i just had sex bonerless
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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