Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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