I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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