im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Randomize
