I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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