If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
