my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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