i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Randomize