i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
