these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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