we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Mom said you looked used
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
