please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
