Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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