We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize