TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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