the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Randomize
