Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
