So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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