at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
third nipple confirmed
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
