Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
All the doctor said was why
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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