The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
