There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
