The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
