so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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