THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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