I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize