He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
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