I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
