I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize