He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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