i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
