Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Randomize
