I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
