the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Can you bring me the toilet please
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
