I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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